Opinion

Tim Farron: Who are you kidding?

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Can you hear that repetitive, dull clanging? That is the sound of a bare-footed Tim Farron pacing around the dustbin of history, banging his Birkenstocks on the wall, desperate for attention. “We can become the official party of opposition” squeaks Farron with Pavlovian regularity. Who is he kidding? To go from 8 MPs to over 100 is fanciful. I doubt that parliamentary administrators are feverishly re-writing the rules on wearing sandals in the chamber, in preparation for the Liberal Democrat surge.

Farron’s predictable claims that the Liberal Democrats can act as a bulwark against Tory party excess, are risible. Who can forget the nauseating pre-coital mating ritual between Cameron and Clegg, in the rose garden, or their subsequent five years making the beast with two backs. All in the name of what’s best for Britain

Do not be fooled by the lilliputian toady, Farron. The merest sniff of power and he’ll be back in his birthday suit and dry-humping Theresa May’s leg. All for whats best for Britain, of course.

After a week of car-crash performances by Farron, The Liberal Democrats have finally launched their general election campaign – with all the fanfare of a wet fart – at a gathering of five people and a placard, in Manchester.

The launch has been overshadowed by repeated questions over Farron’s attitudes towards homosexuality – unreasonably, according to some.

Why does he constantly get asked about his attitudes towards homosexuality? Well, my guess would be because he consistently refused to answer. What do his personal beliefs have to do with his political life, I hear you ask. Well, I don’t believe that it is unreasonable to question the attitudes of a so-called progressive politician towards a minority group, before putting an X next to his name.

Politicians crave power, and Farron is no different. Unfortunately for him, Nick Clegg’s shameful coalition betrayal has left the Liberal Democrats looking as trustworthy as a liar. People have long memories. Despite this, Farron will one day see his name alongside some of the big beasts of political history – just not for his contribution to British life. Farron, is following in the footsteps of such esteemed luminaries as Michael Heseltine, and Denis Healey, in cultivating the kind of eye-brows on which you could graze a modestly sized herd of cattle.

Vote for Liberal Democrats and their resident oddball, Farron?…… No thanks.

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