Opinion

Brangelina. Whose ‘team’ are we on? Who gives a…???

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Brangelina: whose team are YOU on? Yes, this is a serious question from our mainstream media.

Brangelina: no more

The news that Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are no more was certainly a shocker. Not only did it rock Hollywood, but it stunned fans and the media both across the world and in UK.

Now that the dust has settled a bit, let’s try to understand what has actually happened.

The actress filed divorce paperwork on Monday, and announced on Tuesday that yes, the glamorous American couple were about to be separated.

As with any divorce, Jolie has asked for a few things, including some properties and full custody of the six children.

So yes, like in any divorce the main question is about the children. What will happen to them? Who will take care of them until they are adults? It’s a very emotional question for any family.

The children come first… don’t they?

Don’t worry, Jolie has requested joint-custody, which will give Pitt, the father, a say on how to educate their children, on which school they will go and what kind of food they eat. Like any father, he wants to be involved in the education of his children. We are now feeling better, aren’t we?

But Pitt has the option to fight Jolie and could try to get full custody of his children. Because is Jolie able to be a good loving mother? After all, she also works a lot and is always between a “cocktail party” in LA or holidays in Monte Carlo.

You may have already noticed but Brangelina are not like us; they are different. They are super rich people. Since they both got married in 2014, Forbes has estimated they have earned about $117.5m together. Let’s think about what $117.5m really means for ‘normal people’ here in UK. That’s over £90.5m or £3.7m per month. That’s £942,000 a week and £134,673 a day!

The median salary in UK is £27,195 a year and most of you reading this article now, may actually not earn this; you may be on a zero-hours contract and wondering how you will feed your children.

Goodness gracious, the papers!

That’s why ‘the media meltdown’ that we have seen about Jolie saying to Pitt that she could no longer be his wife isn’t news. But all our mainstream media yesterday had them on their front pages.

The Times suggested that the couple was divorcing after 12 years together because of Jolie. She had taken the decision to leave Pitt for the “health of the family”:

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The Guardian wrote in red letters that Brangelina splits, citing “irreconcilable differences”. Well, like any divorce then:

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The Sun (is it a newspaper, anyway?) went batsh*t about it and explained why Jolie dumped Pitt – with sordid details:

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But the Daily Mirror wasn’t better and also echoed rumours of Pitt’s alleged affair with French actress Marion Cotillard:

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Scisco’s view on Brangelina’s breakup:

Who cares? Two stars that have far too much money have decided to end their relationship. This isn’t news for us. But we had to have an article on them, too. Therefore, we have decided to write the truth behind this non-story.

The mainstream media like to have a good story to sell even if it is not news, and even if it will not change your lives. These two are not “normal people”. They live in a bubble made of super rich people, the so-called 1%, where taking the family to a breakfast together is a PR stunt of its own. Yes, that’s what they did in July.

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